Budlong Ave

2008-11-06T10:53:00.000-08:00

Powerful

2008-11-06T10:47:00.000-08:00

Go Bama!

2008-11-04T20:02:00.001-08:00

Road Trip: Guaya Guaya Fest

2008-07-26T18:17:00.001-07:00

Karl wanted to go to some reggaeton concert with a bunch of those gay reggaeton artists he likes. It's a 2 day concert thats pretty popular out here. I'm in the "apartment" aka the bedroom being rented as an apt, recovering from last night. KP went on a solo mission for day 2. I can take only so much reggaeton.

The concert was on the other side of the island...take a look at the map.

It took us 3 hours to get there. Thats further than a trip to San Diego!

We pull up to a dirt field with a stage in the middle, beer stands galore and a ton of puerto ricans. Yup! This is where it's at.

OKAY, the concert was suppose to begin at 7 but the DJ was the only artist there I guess cause we stood there for an hour before any singing/rapping artist came on.

Finally, the Puerto Rican Jill Scott came out

She was actually cool, she was backing up on random dudes from the audience and had a song about "ehhstripurs" or in english...STRIPPERS.

Her dancers were looking very nice.

I just pointed the camera backward and snapped a picture of the crowd. There was easily 2000 people there and you felt it. It was an outdoor thing and it felt like a suana. Standing in total for 8 hours in the human suana caused my brain to go into coma mode. The pain took over and I just stood the rest of the night with a blank stare on my face which everyone could clearly see read "I DON'T WANT TO BE HERE".

Some other artists came out...did there thing...sound was lost, crowd started singing the songs, it got hotter from all the hot breaths singing. Sound came back, more artists. Its 12:45 a.m. and the artist everyone was waiting for finally came out.

De La Ghetto

I'm not gonna lie, I caught myself dancing to his performance...and thanks to KPs ipod I caught myself knowing some of the words LOL.

He got off stage, some other dude came on but I was done so I headed to the car and waited for K.P. to get his jollies off. The concert ended at 2:30 a.m. but it took us an hour to leave the parking lot. 3 hr road trip back to the apartment left us with a 6:30-6:45a.m. arrival...gave us enough time to take a 2 hr nap before we had to move out our studio into an even smaller studio.

Denise? Who?

2008-07-25T02:23:00.000-07:00

After being Storm chasers for a day and waiting out the storm, we headed down to CLUB MILK in OLD SAN JUAN for some music and drinks.

I'm proud of my brother, Karl. He made budlong proud today. Here he is with his new girl.

Budlong Storm Chasers

2008-07-25T02:10:00.000-07:00

My previous post showed how death was coming our way. Well, leaving Old San Juan I could see something brewing

so I had K.P. follow that shit, LOL.

I'm in the passenger giddy as hell thinking I'm the Discovery Channel chasing down a storm when out of nowhere ALL HELL BREAKS LOOSE AND WE GET CAUGHT IN THE STORM

Drive, Nigga! Drive!!!!

We get home, wind gusts and tidal wave rainfall chasing after us, we make it safely into our apt and wait out the tropical storm.

Old San Juan: Revisited

2008-07-25T01:43:00.000-07:00

Today, we decided to go back to Old San Juan to chill and to shop. They have a few outlets (Polo, Coach, Guess). Well, the afternoon started off really weird. As we go to the car, it's full sun blasting under us but to our rights you see death coming.

It was surreal but we headed on out to San Juan

Did My shopping

Coach had an additional 50% off clearance sale going so I had to take care of my family.

Been craving a frap, so me and K.P. stopped by Starbucks and caught up with our text messaging. Ended our afternoon there.

El Yunque: Puerto Rican Rain Forest

2008-07-25T00:55:00.000-07:00

So, decided to get my steve irwin on, r.i.p, and visit the rain forest and have an advencha! Crikey!

The rain forest is huge and you gotta take these winding ass roads to get to the trails. It took us about 20 minutes from the bottom to reach the trail we set out to traverse.
Here begins our journey

Little did we know that the trail went all downhill for 30 minutes to reach the waterfalls. 30 minutes downhill can only mean 1 thing....30 minutes UP! Ay ya Ay, good thing my trainer, Cocksville, has prepared me for this cardio workout.
Down we go...

But wait, K.P. encountahs something he's not to shaa of, could it be anofa species?

No. Karl, its a woman!!!

Down some more...shit is beginning to be an endless trek down but finally we reach our destination.

Aftah Figyaing out there wasn't any crocodiles or alligatahs, it was time to go home. And so began a 30 minute climb.

Puerto Rican Strip Clubs

2008-07-21T00:13:00.000-07:00

SUCK. I really can't say much more than that. SUCK. I could use expletives but why, in the end, the strip clubs out here royally SUCK.

Sunday is really the day of Lord out here so everything closes early but restaurants and of course SKRIP CLUBS. A quick K.P. research lands us at DIVAS GENTLEMENS CLUB. Situated on a lavish strip of realty in the middle of San Juan, DIVAS is where the women of puerto rico come to build their resume in the area of STRIP TEASE.
oooo la la.

Paid $10 to get in and was given a free drink card (which when you try to redeem you're given some black market off brand liquor with some store brand juice). Here is where the SU comes as you must continue to drink a beverage as long as you're there. Thats right...you wanna see some chi chi's and nalgas, you have to always be consuming something. Whack! Ordered a damned heineken which costed $9.50, thats not a typo...NINE DOLLARS AND 50 CENTS! I can go on a date for $9.50 and get more than TOPLESS DANCING.

Seeing how we were in Puerto Rico and every women we've passed on the streets, malls, and various establishments are neck breaking beautiful, I expected some bad women. Like 40-50 inch butts and cup sizes in the Ds and above but noooooooo we get three girls...3! And now this is where the CK completes the word...SUCK! We stayed for an hr and saw all of them twice which is the first for me. The highlight of the night was me having a pretty elaborate conversation with one of the dancers while she was on stage performing. Found out her real name, that she's from MIAMI and that she really had to boo boo. All in all, it beat staying home watching DEADLIEST CATCH MARATHON.

The moral of the story? DO NOT GO TO DIVAS. HELL, DO NOT GO OUT OF THE COUNTRY TO VISIT A STRIP CLUB. In hindsight I feel really damned stupid for forking over $20 tonight. DEADLIEST CATCH doesn't sound too bad now that I think of it. I told Pounders to just call the girl on craigslist. At least with craigslist you're guaranteed happy endings.

Old San Juan: Karl got a date? No, He HAD DATES!

2008-07-20T19:42:00.000-07:00

For the moment, half nude women have to wait to be posted for tomorrow. Last night me and K.P. headed down to OLD SAN JUAN to have a good time.....but we forgot about the girls we met on the beach. We kinda met them there but really didn't cause we forgot we told them we were going there, anyway we met up, chilled and wouldn't you know it. Pounders had a THREESOME

PHOTO THAT IS....

From Left to Right ( Massiel, Pounders, and Brenda)

Girls are hot, right? The one on the left is a Brazilian/Dominican mix and the one on the right is Puerto Rican, both from New Yawwwwwwk! They were both cool but I think Karl like Brenda more.

We bullshitting, girls wanted to take pictures till we had to get back to the dock for a party boat thing we was gonna go on. Well I let Karl handle his business and started thinking...this isn't always a good thing. Being that I am without shame...I'm that guy that will spark up conversations with complete strangers just because. Well, just cause I'm in another country don't mean I've changed.

It was damn near 3a.m. when I spotted this couple near where we were taking pictures. Got to talking to them, the dude is 17 and his girl is 16 and they just relaxing at 3 a.m. in the morning. The funny thing about P.R. is that kids are like grown folks out there. They have no curfew...This shit baffled me cause my mom wouldn't let me cross the street til I was 15, LOL.

We head back to the dock to get on the our party boat but what ensues next is neither exaggerated nor made up in any way, shape or form.

Thats the New Yawwk girls yelling at the owner of the boat for a refund. The boat that had left before us was cracking but when the time came for us to go that shit was straight bootie...there was 4 people on the boat...US! we paid $14 each for that shit.

We get off the boat, they argue and try to slang their tickets to people walking by but one of the promoters kept cock blocking her and was offering the tickets for $7 each instead of the $14, LOL. Cold piece that lady was.

Well a good hour passes by just arguing and then a break in the tension.

Met some more folk from New Yawwk...one just happened to be wearing the exact but opposite of my shirt. Real cool dudes.

Long story short, we walk off with all the NEW YAWWWKERS and head to a pub. Yadda Yadda, I end up drunk within 10 minutes cause I think I'm in Los Angeles and take every drink to the head. 2 hen and cokes and 2 cranberry vodkas. Ehh, it's just a liver.

end the night by stumbling to the car, coming home to the cramped, hot waterless hell hole and knock out.

ISLA VERDE

2008-07-19T18:50:00.000-07:00

ISLA VERDE

Today's Mission: GO TO THE BEACH...WHERE THERE'S NO SHORTAGE OF WOMEN...AND GET KARL LAID.

We head out to one of the many beaches here in Puerto Rico, ISLA VERDE, but if you're puerto rican you'd pronunce it
ISLA VERLE. They omit the R's out here and I'm already borderline retarded when it comes to speaking Spanish in front
of people I know speak it better so you can imagine my face when I'm conversing with these folks. Anyway on to the pictures

I know my objective so as soon as I set foot on the beach I get to work. I find two young women who I know will get the
"she can get it" approval from K.P.

In reality, everyone can pretty much get it. Karls used this phrase about 600 times out here and the locals are
catching on. Its seems he's started a new catch phrase but back to the topic.

I do my job

As she walks towards me I can't help but think why I don't holler but then I remember what I was sent out here to do

I send Karl on his way

and what would you know....HE ACTUALLY HOLDS A NICE OCEAN SWIM CONVERSATION WITH NOT ONE BUT WITH BOTH OF THEM.

By the look on K.P.'s face he's excited.

The end result of todays interaction is TO BE CONTINUED. We exchanged info and what not. Turns out they're
from New York and here on vacation so we have a small window of time to get these girls drunk enough to have sex
with Karl.

I'll post more pictures of the women I was stalking for K.P. tomorrow. STAY TUNED!

Karl: The 28 year old Belizean Virgin

2008-07-19T17:18:00.000-07:00

We last left you landing in Puerto Rico.
Karl wanted to rent an apartment instead of hotel. I was unsure of his decision but he'd already paid half the bill and to my surprise I had to pay the balance as soon as we got here...

This is gonna be home for the next few weeks..matter fact,

WELCOME TO MTV CRIBS: PUERTO RICAN VAGINA SEARCH EDITION

Here is the front room. Thats Karl saying "hey" to all you internet folks

The blog cuts the picture off but Im using the couch as a bed. Why? Well to answer your question, the place was a lil suspect on the housekeeping. The last renters left fucking tampons in the trash. Tampons! Used, Tampons! yuck! Well that and the fact that the beds were turned down as we moved in left me with no other choice than to sleep on the couch which also called for layers of defense.

Here are the two bedrooms

I never layed on the bed but yet it has this slept in look, huh?

This is Pounders bedroom, WHERE THE MAGIC DOESN'T HAPPEN.

Off to our "luxurious" bathroom. I think whoever designed this bathroom was drunk off that Bacardi.

I think they told the home depot guys..."Give me the ugliest color toilet, beday and tub you have then give me the ugliest colored toilet seat cover".

The shower head was also broken and kinda rested on the tub floor which kinda defeated the purpose of having a shower head in my opinion. I took pictures of that shit but I don't know where they are. Ehh.

BREAKING NEWS!!!! BREAKING NEWS!!!!! BREAKING NEWS!!!!!

Our good friend K.P., who booked this place, didn't tell me that our apt would soon change into a fucking shed. You see, to save $200 not renting a hotel, the genius here rather be moved from a 2 bedroom, amply sized apt to a fucking studio!!! As you
can see by the use of exclamation points I was not happy. We go from a 2 bedroom apt to this shit...

So yeah, now I'm sujected to claustrophobic quarters where I get to witness this everyday.

It was cool in a 2 bedroom and I love K.P., man tits and all, but this is madness. Small ass studio, you can literally
trip and be in the bathroom and vice versa.

Well enough ranting from me...TODAY, we went to ISLA VERDE, Puerto Rican Beach...I'll have pictures of the women up tonight
or tomorrow.

SHOUT OUT to Cocksville and Diamond D, fellow Budlong Brothers and to our families. Whatup Fat and JLO.

Budlong does Puerto Rico: The Quest to get K, Pounders Laid

2008-07-18T20:46:00.000-07:00

This is the first of many posts to come of Budlong Ave. What is Budlong Ave? Well, Budlong Ave is a street in Los Angeles, CA but for the sake of this blog it represents a group of friends and their adventures and more times than not, their misadventures. More on the history and members in another post.

We start off with a month long photo series of a trip to Puerto Rico with the sole objective of GETTING KARL LAID! You see, the city of Los Angeles was unable to provide a woman who would actually let my friend,Karl aka K.Pounders, aka Karamelo Pounders, aka Karlito, aka "I'm visiting from Miami", aka "She can get it", actually beat. The sense of urgency was being felt throughout the budlong circle; therefore, I joined karl, 3000 miles away, on a trip to Puerto Rico in hopes that Karl would somehow get what had become his unicorn, VAGINA!

On with the pictures....

Our adventure starts on Continental Flight 1694

This is Karl. You can see the distraught look on his face caused by the lack of intercourse.

This is Victor aka Taco

I jacked karl for the window seat... I wanted the ability to document our death if anything had happened.

The airline fed us a pretty good meal which consisted of salad and a chesseburger....which ended up giving me the bubblies. Landed in the H-town and quickly hopped on our next flight to San Juan, Puerto Rico. I think the stewardess was trying to kill me cause the meal on this flight gave me nightmares. I was clinching my ass cheeks the whole flight. Flying around in the biggest, cramped piece of metal ever, 5hrs later we landed in Puerto Rico at 5:30 a.m. to 90 degree, humid, sticky ass weather. Beautiful still.